Cuban Complaint Letter

[SecondChance99]

THIS IS A LETTER FROM A CUBAN... WHO DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO EXPRESS HIMSELF IN ENGLISH.

Dier Senior Gerente Jotel:

Now I am tell yu di story jau I was treated at yor jotel. I cum from miami florida as touris to orlando and estay at yor jotel. When I cum in my room I see der is no shit in my bed. How can I sleep with no shit in my bed?

Ay col down de ricepchon and tell dem: -"I wanna shit".

Dey tell me "Go to the toilet".. I sey "No, no, I wanna shit in my bed". Dey sey "You betta not shit in yor bed, you sonnawabitch".

What is that of sonnawabitch?.
I go down for di restoran for breikfast. I order beicon and eggs and two pisses of toast, I getta only one piss oftoast. I tell di waitress and I points to toast.

"I wanna piss". She tella me Go to the toilet"...
I say "No, No, I wanna piss on my plate".

She den say to me:
"You piss on yor plate, I col da cops, you sonnawabitch".

Secon person who don even know me, and chi col me sonnawabitch!
What is that of sonnawabitch?

Later I go a dinner into restoran. Spoon and knife is der but no fock. I tell di waitress "I wanna fock!", and she tell me:- "Sure, everybody wanna fock". I tell her "No, no, you don onderstand me. I wanna fock on di table".

She den tell me "So you sonnawabitch, you wanna fock on de table? Get yur ass out of here".

So I go to di ricepchon and ask for di bil. I no wanna stay in dis jotel no more. When I have pay di bil, the porter say to me: "Thank you and piss be with you".

I say "piss on you too, you sonnawabitch!
"If I go back to orlando, I'll never more comma stay in your jotel, you sonnawabitch.


Sinsirly,
John Towers From-the-Ass,
(Juan Torres Delano)

[Gear Head]

lmao! Hilarious! Sounds better if you read it aloud.

[bz1]

When did you go up to Orlando?????

[SecondChance99]

Originally Posted by bz1

When did you go up to Orlando?????

Ju no, a cuple uff wiks ago.

[SecondChance99]

Originally Posted by Gear Head

lmao! Hilarious! Sounds better if you read it aloud.

If you ever come to a sushi night or any other event, I'll read it to you.